Hey Baby... I Exist

I'm watching my 16 year old clean the house.

I'm gonna let that sink in here for a moment.... my 16 year old... is cleaning the house.

He even came inside to ask for a pressure washer for the front walkway. This is an intense bout of home care from the young man.

Now, some of you may be confused as to why this young man has stepped up in this manner, but I'm thinking that others of you may know the answer. Because it's possible that you do the same thing.

Here's what's going on: There is a girl coming over this evening. Yup, a GIRL. A lovely young woman who has earned the right to visit a clean house.

Or, possibly, has stirred up anxiety in the 16 year old.

Because here's the thing. It has been requested that I not be weird tonight. It has been requested that the annoying little brothers go to bed before our guest arrives. It has been requested that I help get the house in tip-top shape.

And while I applaud my son for wanting to provide a lovely, movie watching experience for his girlfriend, I also know that his insecurities are showing. And it is because of this that I will help him clean, get his brothers out of the way and not be...too weird...

Because I also know what it's like to feel insecure in myself. To want to prove my worth to those around me. To not get judged because my floor is extremely sticky from last week's spilled juice. To believe that I'm only as important as the size of my house or the job that I have.

But what I will also teach my kiddos is that they don't need to prove that they're worth it. They don't need a clean house, better bike, more Lego, or a non-weird Mom, to prove that they're important.

Because they and me and each of us are important and worthy of love regardless of what we do or what we have. We're important and love-worthy simply because we exist. Our anxiety lies and tells us that we need to perform or meet some standard or suck up pain or... the list goes on. But please, understand that those are lies and the truth is so much more simple and profound. You are worthy of love because you are here.

But in the meantime, I also know that teenage love is a tender thing and impressing a girl with your cleaning skills may take you farther in life than wooing her with the pick up line... "Hey Baby, I exist".